I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Randomize
