It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize
