is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
