dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
