wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
