at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
