Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize