where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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