Having a random hookup so left but love u
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
Do vagina's smell?
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
