my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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