would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Randomize
