As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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