I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Randomize
