Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
