I can't breathe out the right side of my face
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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