i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
