How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
