dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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