sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
