I puked a lego.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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