No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
