So drunk its hurt
Are we in a gay sports bar?
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Success! We fucked roommates!
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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