last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
