You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
My life is pants optional.
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