Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
