How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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