So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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