i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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