I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize