Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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