he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
