considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Randomize
