Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Are my feet made of real feet?
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
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