I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
