I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I think a kid would responsible me up
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
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