OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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