You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Randomize
