Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
my shit smells like andre
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
