Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
