Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize