How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
