im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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