We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
then he tried to convert me to islam
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
