question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
