Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
worst night to have a conscience
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
