IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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