There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
