So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
