I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
don't judge my taste in strippers
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
