That's intense
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I love how my cats smell like pot.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I need water and some morals
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Randomize
